Mid-blog crisis

                This is my fiftieth post. Isn’t that absolutely fabulous? I was told that I should make it special, because that’s such a milestone number. On the other hand, shouldn’t I be going through my mid-blog crisis? I mean, really, 50? It’s so old. Wait, actually, I probably should’ve had my mid-blog crisis a long time ago. I thought that I would just completely stop blogging at 50. But also, I said that I would blog once for every day (staring from that random day, the thirteenth, I believe) in November. Therefore, to finish that, I would need to blog more than 50 times. And I realized, I rather like blogging, so why not just keep going, even after the class is over? After all, this isn’t much of a writing fiction blog anymore. So far, I have succeeded in not making this special at all. Maybe I should put fireworks in. Maybe I should’ve blogged extra so that this post would’ve landed on Thanksgiving. Maybe I should not put a picture of Big Bang up today just to make today special (ha, yeah right). Maybe I should – nah, nevermind.

                After all, I really have nothing to talk about. It’s a lot about what I should have done, or should do, as opposed to what I am doing. Oh my goodness, I am really actually having a mid-blog crisis.Flail flail flail fail flail oh no this blog is halfway to it’s death already! Actually, it’s probably either more than halfway to its death, or nowhere near that. I think that this is a better way of keeping a diary. Except for it’s a whole ton more public, and I’m a whole ton less angsty. Actually, having this be a mid-blog crisis is oddly amusing and hilarious to me. People’s dreams are rather hilarious. I like J-‘s dream. It is fun and fabulous, although if I were there I would be pretty freaked out. Also, E- is equal to Eeyore because she lost her tail and was desperately trying to find it. I would be kind of really disturbed if E- grew a tail. Or if I grew a tail. I think that tails would be very inconvenient. I had a dream where I had to perform with C-, but she was dying of asthma/lung cancer. It was kind of extra morbid. In the end, she couldn’t sing anymore and it was extra terrible. She didn’t die though, so that was okay.

                People live in literal land. More than prism people. That was so shocking to me. And it was kind of extra hilarious, and I was extra cruel and terrible and mocked them. But not really mock. More like, pretended I was extra literal. Okay, maybe I was mocking them. But hopefully, they are the opposite of sarcastic and do not realize. But if they do not realize, I will be extra sad because really, what does that mean the world is coming to? Sadness. There is absolutely no snow left. The air is getting warmer and warmer. This means that I actually have to do homework and prepare for Monday. That’s actually even more saddening than the literal land people. I would really rather not work at all.

                I have this habit of tying my hair up funny when I’m at home. I tie it into two buns, one at the very top of my head and one at the back of my head. This way, I can be sure that all of the hair is out of my face. I’m not sure why I keep long hair when I hate it in my face or feeling it on my neck. It’s just so… inconvenient. But also, I have decided to have long hair from now on. I was sorely tempted to cut it after my whole heartbreak heartache thing as a “moving on” gesture, but then I realized that it wasn’t worth growing it out again. Sorry, you’re not worth it. I love my hair more than you matter to me.

               I’ve had a really nice long break. No work, no homework (well, I will have homework, I just haven’t done it thus far), minimal college (that was a really bad decision on my behalf. I really should’ve just caught up on my work while I could). Sleep is fabulous, and so is just lazing around the house. I feel like a kitty. I do not want to be a kitty. Kitties do not like me. I scream at them and then they do backflips and run out the door. This is the relationship I have with kitties.

                I was going to do a complimentary piece of Inx’s violence piece, but I changed my mind. I’m not really in the mood. Also, that post really freaks me out. Maybe I’ll do a piece that is similar… or in the objective of the abuser? It would be an interesting take. I’ll see, maybe I’ll do the two points of view again. And it would be a writing fiction post. I wonder even if after the class is over, if I will do writing-practice pieces on my blog. Perhaps I will, but I believe that a vast majority of them will be very much like this – random and broken and talking about anything and everything that I want.

                And thus is a window to the brain of InvisiblePink. Perhaps I will make this post special by making it extra long. After all, I’m sure I can just go on and on and on and on about anything and everything. It’ll just be not that interesting. Hmm, what else to talk about. Surprisingly, I’m drawing a blank. I usually don’t do that, like ever. Or maybe when I’m pressuring myself to keep writing, I automatically cannot anymore. Or perhaps whenever I draw I blank, I draw a blank subconsciously and then I just wrap up my post consciously. And then I think that I am super awesome for never drawing a blank, but maybe I do on a constant basis! Oh goodness, subconscious vs. conscious attention… implicit versus explicit? Declarative versus non-declarative? I think I need to read the textbook, since I was gone a lot from class these last two chapters. Shame on me.

                I really like raspberries. But only in lotion. It makes everything smell absolutely fabulous. And it makes me want to eat raspberry desserts. No, not actually raspberries. Just the desserts, because the lotion smells fabulously sweet and yummy. I think I have changed a lot from when I was little. I’m looking at the little picture of me when I was in elementary school. I don’t really bear any semblance, not at all. Of course, that’s just from my perspective. People tell me (well, Asian parents) that I’m growing every time I see them. It’s really exciting, besides the fact that they’re obviously lying to me. I haven’t grown in forever. I’d like to think that I’m growing, but that’s just a feeble attempt to make myself feel better. I’d also like to think that I’ve come to terms with my height, but I really haven’t done that either.

                E- is so cruel. She was like, “can you get that basket by yourself?” And then I try to. And then I flail in midair, and then she laughs at me because she knows that I could’ve have gotten it in the first place. She just wanted me to because she is a cruel and cold person. Shame on you. Actually, I have that problem at internship too. I just reach for things that are on high shelves, and then I flail for about fifteen minutes and then realize that I can use a pen or another pokey tool to use as an extension of my arm. Except for not fifteen minutes, and I realize that it’s probably a bad idea. I don’t really want things to come toppling down and make a loud noise at internship. I can do that at home. Or at school, where it is loud already. But J- would beg to differ. She says my house seems like it is abandoned and haunted and really creepy. But I could never live in a haunted house. I would get too freaked out all the time.

                I think I really want food. I am blogging about food and my stomach is complaining about how it’s not getting any food. But, stomach, I am blogging and therefore cannot get you any food! You must understand this. Oh stomach, stop complaining, I don’t think I’m going to stop typing until I reach 2,000 words. So far, I am around 1,400. Only 600 more to go, which is actually a pretty easy task. Okay, maybe food first, if you absolutely insist. But I will not post until I am at an epic word count. And this post is ridiculously long, and no one wants to read it. Maybe I will add a picture in the middle, just to keep people going. Actually, it wouldn’t keep anyone going besides me. I like pictures.  

                I like pictures. Pictures are worth a thousand words. If they are actually worth a thousand words, then my word count is around 2,500 right now. Ha, I win. But no, I will actually get around 2,000 words if not more. Maybe I will tell you about my dreams. Hm, no, I think I will get food first. I want food. Food is good.

                Hurray! Food was good. And I have completely lost my train of thought. But also, if one picture is worth a thousand words, then what about a video? That’s like a whole ton of pictures put together, with sound. That’s got to be worth a lot of words, yes? Haha, I won’t post a video. That would be kind of ridiculous.

                I’m also amazed by the number of scams that are floating around these days. I don’t understand why it has come to attention all of a sudden: have they increased in number, or have they simply just gotten more interesting? Also, it’s kind of shocking that there are so many, and that everyone seems to be getting them/getting exposed to them. After, prisoners/refugees in Africa/England/etc. need our support (and bank numbers and social security numbers and all that). Ha, I wonder how many people they are able to trick. It’s really badly done… you’d think that everyone would be smart enough not to give away their social security numbers, emails, addresses, identities… But I’m sure it works. Maybe even one in a hundred thousand, but that’s enough to make it worthwhile (actually, I have no idea). Silly people, do not listen to scams.

                I do not get spam. Or maybe I do, but my email is just extra awesome and gets rid of it before I see it. Therefore, I just know that it exists, but it doesn’t have to clutter up my inbox. Although seriously, some colleges clutter up my inbox. I do not care about some colleges, nor will I ever think of applying and/or attending that college. No matter how much you beg and plead and send emails and mail and kill more trees. I will not take pity on you.  You are not important enough to me. I just delete you right when you get into my inbox. I do not even bother looking at the messages. So stop sending them to me. You’re obnoxious.

                I just realized that in three weeks, I’ll have winter break. Isn’t that awesome? There was just a week off for Thanksgiving and snow, and in three weeks, there will be two weeks off for sheer awesomeness. That makes me smile with absolute dazzling joy. But also, it means that my early action decisions are coming back… which would definitely make or break my winter break. Oh my goodness, I am so amazingly scared. I really want to be accepted, but I do not know if I can be. In fact, I’m pretty sure that I will get at least deferred. *Frets* I hate thinking about that.

                And that, ladies and gentlemen, is over 2,000 words. Hurray! I can’t believe that writing my extended essay was so hard (just kidding, those were 4,000 relevant words, as opposed to this randomness). I will go post more pictures of Big Bang. *scrolls through my ever increasing album of pictures* I do not know which one I will pick today. Well, I just know it will be extra fabulous, anyhow.